Day Trip to McMenamins Kennedy School for some Drinks and an Outdoor Soak

After negotiating some hellish mid-day traffic, I arrived at @amandarichards’ house where we decided what to do with the day. We both love going to the various McMenamins establishments in the state because we can get some work done while there, but also indulge in a little bit of Portland hedonism.

The largest such facility I’m aware of is McMenamins Edgefield, which has on site glass blowing classes, multiple restaurants and bars (in the same indoor complex), and outdoor hot tubs. The one we went to today was smaller but still had a lovely, hot outdoor soaking pool.

The point of these complexes is so people can get wasted, then safely do a lot of things that are fun and pleasurable to do while drunk. McMenamins is a huge chain of bars and these complexes are like a booze themed disneyland for grownups. you’re supervised by employees who pretty much babysit happy confused drunks as they move between the different amenities.

Presumably this is where the corpses of unruly patrons are kept. This is a 102 year old building which in all seriousness probably conceals many fascinating mysteries. Not even all of them are booze related either, I bet. Just most.

Get a load of this steampunk bar with an old boiler at the core. I absolutely love the decor. The railings are made of plumbing components and random turn of the century machinery is mounted to the walls here and there.

Above: Some of that beautiful old timey machinery. Below: A closer look at the plumbing hand railings.

There’s a downstairs section as well, though in my opinion not as cozy:

The posters and paintings are all period appropriate to the turn of the century, which I appreciate. We ordered our food only to be notified by text that it was our turn to soak in the outdoor pool. We hastily let the waiter know so our food preparation didn’t begin.

An amusing headline on a newspaper left on the counter. Amanda and I got here and back on battery power. I am not sweating over the prospect of rising gas prices, as I can choose not to use any. There’s plenty of cool stuff, like this place, within reach without using a drop of gas.

I would have appreciated being able to charge here, and they didn’t have even a single charging station, but I left a suggestion card recommending a trio of J1772, SAE Combo and Tesla chargers for the parking lot.

There was an elevator just for wheelchairs that impressed me. The confines of the two story restaurant don’t really allow for a sufficiently gradual ramp, so it makes sense they’d do this. I appreciate anybody from any background and walk of life can come get blackout drunk here. After all, that’s what Portland is all about.

Anyway, following the hour long soak we did wind up getting dinner. I didn’t think to photograph it, lacking the instagram gene millenials were born with apparently. I had a crabcake burger with spicy cajun tots, Amanda ate the tots as well as a small salad.

It was a bit of a hassle to get showered and dressed after the pool due to how crowded the place was, but I did appreciate not having to leave with chlorine in my hair. By the by, near the end of our hour it began to rain, which was an interesting sensation. Cold rain on our heads, though our bodies were immersed in warm water.

But then the rain became hail. Not so fun or romantic anymore, but nature feebly trying to kill us as it has since the dawn of time. The meal after the soak concluded our visit as the movie they were showing in the theater was Jumanji, and I just couldn’t make myself.

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